Life: Another Poem

The Clock of life seems never ending.
When I just want to get away from it all,
Is when it’s at its slowest.
Never could I have imagined the pain that I feel
For it is too great to ever believe as real.
I realize that nothing is ever perfect,
But there’s never a day when I didn’t wish that life was.
Maybe it’s just me, but life almost seems too long
For the path I walk is lined with fog.
Everyone has seen the reality of who I am,
Yet at the same time, I am still a mystery.
It’s possible that I could be imagining everything,
I know there are people, who care about me,
But I wonder if it’s enough to fill the void that exists.
My only escape is through my friends and dance
For no one has ever really heard about my REAL life
Everything up until now has been a façade
Nothing was real.
I have masked my feelings for so long
That everything I feel just wants to flow out
Like a volcano ready to explode
My heart is ready to burst
I want to put my heart into this poem
So that one day I might actually feel good about myself,
For right now is not the best time in my life.
As I sit here I feel my emotions pouring out,
And although I am ready to just stop and cry,
I know that what I do will never satisfy.
Unless I finish all the way to the end,
And know that I will never look back again
To a time when the path I followed seemed too tough
As if I was gasping for breath with every step I took.
Now as I look back for this one final time,
There is just one message that I almost didn’t notice:
Listen to your heart and everything will be fine
Any journey you follow will have a sign.
This knowledge can be your motivation,
To help you to reach your destination.
If I hadn’t stopped to rethink my thoughts
I would never be where I am now nor where I will be in the future…

The Life that I Live

Everyday that I live seems to pass slowly by
As I walk through life wondering why.
My soul longs for freedom,
The ability to be alone with my thoughts,
But every waking moment takes me farther away
Like that of a cloud that never stays.
The Sun should shine bright as the cloud disappears
But for me I am just entrenched in darkness of fears.
Never will I be understood as just an ordinary person,
But compared to the perfection that is my sister.
I wish that a single moment could change everything for the better
However I know that it isn’t true
My family just doesn’t understand
The pain that surrounds me,
My survival is only a figment of their imagination,
No longer a soul, but a fake presentation,
Of who I really am.
Only my friends truly know me
Because with them I feel totally free,
Like that of a bird with the whole world to venture through
Without stopping to wonder what others think of you.
Now I realize as I see the words I’ve written,
Everything seems so much clearer.
As if the world wants to give me another chance
And let me live my dream and learn how to dance.
The ability to Freak my dream
Just makes me want to scream,
To show to the world my dedication,
Just as the Beat Freaks have been my inspiration.